Apply for the Sisterhood here."Just think positive!" "Be grateful!" "Look on the bright side!" We've all heard it—and we've all tried it. But forcing positive thoughts when you're genuinely struggling doesn't work. In fact, it makes things worse. In this episode, you'll learn why false positivity exhausts you, the ladder approach to building authentic thoughts, and how to process emotions so you can create real holiday joy—not fake happiness.What You'll LearnThe Ladder Metaphor: Why Jumping Doesn't Work Trying to jump from "I'm dreading the holidays" to "I'm so excited!" is like trying to hang Christmas lights without a ladder—you'll exhaust yourself and never reach your goal. You need to build a ladder of authentic thoughts and climb one rung at a time.Why False Positivity Makes Things Worse When you force thoughts you don't believe, you create cognitive dissonance, bypass real emotions, shame yourself, exhaust your energy, and disconnect from authentic joy. Your brain knows when you're lying to it—and it rejects false positivity.The Ladder Approach: Building Authentic Thoughts Instead of jumping to positivity, start where you actually are (no judgment, no "shoulds") and build ladder rungs of thoughts that feel TRUE and progressively more helpful. Each rung should feel authentic while moving you slightly toward empowerment and hope.Thought Flipping vs. False Positivity Thought flipping builds awareness—it shows you that your thoughts aren't facts and that you have options. You can use thought flipping to choose your destination (top of the ladder), then build an authentic path to get there.The Missing Piece: Processing Emotions at Each Rung You can't skip emotions—you have to process them at each rung of your ladder. Bring the "bully" (dread, anger, resentment) closer instead of running from it. Feel it, honor it, work through it. Only then can you authentically move to the next rung.Hi, I'm Julie! I'm a divorced empty nester and the creator of the Life 2.0 Coaching Program.As a certified Life Coach and National Board Certified Heath and Wellness Coach, I help other divorced empty nesters create the new life of their dreams; and I can help you do this, too.🔥 To join the private community of divorced empty nesters just like you, find us on Facebook here. 🎤 Listen to the podcast on Spotify or Apple Podcast. This podcast provides information only, and does not provide any financial, legal, medical or psychological services or advice. None of the content on this website prevents, cures or treats any mental or medical condition. You are responsible for your own financial, legal, physical, mental and emotional well-being, decisions, choices, actions and results. Julie Steed Coaching disclaims any liability for your reliance on any opinions or advice contained in this website.

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