"Why do we cheat? And why do happy people cheat? And when we say "infidelity," what exactly do we mean? Is it a hookup, a love story, paid sex, a chat room, a massage with a happy ending? Why do we think that men cheat out of boredom and fear of intimacy, but women cheat out of loneliness and hunger for intimacy? And is an affair always the end of a relationship? 
 
"But as perpetrators have often said - it isn't always our partner that we are turning away from, but the person that we have ourselves become. And it isn't so much that we're looking for another person, as much as we are looking for another self. 
 
"As Marcel Proust said, it's our imagination that is responsible for love, not the other person."
 
The healing, the renewal, begins there.
 
The above commentary is an extract from Esther Perel's stunning TED talk. 
 

Uncut Poetry is brought to you by Sunil Bhandari. 
Sunil Bhandari is a poet based out of India. His book of poetry 'Of Love and Other Abandonments' was an Amazon bestseller. His second book 'Of journeys & Other Ways to Get Lost' is just out. Both are available in Kindle on Amazon.

 
 

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