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Listen "1. So Much To Do! Our Experience with To Do Lists and Listening to Your Wise Self"
Episode Synopsis
Episode 1: So Much To Do! Our Experience with To Do Lists and Listening to Your Wise Self
Krista came ready to share a clip from Jenna Free that she feels all the time. The clip explores how people with ADHD always feel like they have so much to do. Maybe this relates to time blindness and perfectionism, two common ADHD traits. ADHD folks are trying to do everything at too high of a level.
Michael jumps in with, as an older parent of little kids, he is trying to reframe this thinking so he can be present in the moment, though he acknowledges that it takes effort not to think about the things he "should" be doing. "Maybe my to-do lists are too ambitious."
Krista says that if you ask her community they would say that she's so busy. Does this come from the false idea that to-do lists can be completed? Or maybe because she runs 5 businesses? Krista goes on to explain that her flavor of ADHD, which she now recognizes is common in women, is that she has to chew on at least two things at once.
Sarah asks if this idea of needing to chew on two things is akin to how Newton discovered gravity while sitting under an apple tree. Yes, Krista says, squeeze one idea real hard and then shift focus to something else so her brain can relax and spit out an answer to the first thing. The ladies then talk about how they put a problem on the back burner before sleep or while in the shower and the answer is there when they reboot. Sarah also shares how she recognized this in herself and has consciously worked to value herself whether busy or not. She explains that she heard someone say that sometimes we make ourselves busy to prove to the world that we are important.
Rudy jumps in and does a deep dive on his to-do list while his partner was out of town for two weeks. 12 hours before her return he jumped into overdrive to get it done. He finds he has the most success with lists when he listens to the voice in his head: "it's a man," he thinks "it's probably me." Michael responds that this sounds like what his therapist calls his "Wise Self." Rudy likens it to a coach or a spotter at the gym reminding him to focus on the next step, not the finished product. "Don't do anything else, don't go outside and look at your golf clubs, just go upstairs and start on the bedroom." This Rational Rudy says, calm down just finish "this."
The team briefly talks about doing a superficial job to get thru the list and Krista jokes, "If you don't have time to do it right, you must have time to do it again."
Recorded on 2/23/24
#ADHDListMaking #ToDoLists #ADHDTimeBlindness #TimeBlindness #ADHDPerfectionism #Coaching #ADHDSelfCoaching #Spectrum #ADHDInWomen #Multitasking #Patience #ADHDMultitasking #ProcessingSpeed #ADHDProcessingSpeed #ADHDCompletionAnxiety #CompletionAnxiety #Complete #ADHDHumor #ADHDTypeA #TypeA #LetItGo #ADHDStayAtHomeParents #PrinceHumperdinck #ImSwamped #WiseSelf #ADHDExcuses #BingBingBing #ADHDShowerThoughts #IfYouHaventGotYourHealthThenYouHaventGotAnything #GetSomeRest #HotGuyBlowDryingMyHair #OptimalTimeForADHDers
Link to clip
Jenna Free - ADHDers always have so much to do!
@adhdwithjennafree
Krista came ready to share a clip from Jenna Free that she feels all the time. The clip explores how people with ADHD always feel like they have so much to do. Maybe this relates to time blindness and perfectionism, two common ADHD traits. ADHD folks are trying to do everything at too high of a level.
Michael jumps in with, as an older parent of little kids, he is trying to reframe this thinking so he can be present in the moment, though he acknowledges that it takes effort not to think about the things he "should" be doing. "Maybe my to-do lists are too ambitious."
Krista says that if you ask her community they would say that she's so busy. Does this come from the false idea that to-do lists can be completed? Or maybe because she runs 5 businesses? Krista goes on to explain that her flavor of ADHD, which she now recognizes is common in women, is that she has to chew on at least two things at once.
Sarah asks if this idea of needing to chew on two things is akin to how Newton discovered gravity while sitting under an apple tree. Yes, Krista says, squeeze one idea real hard and then shift focus to something else so her brain can relax and spit out an answer to the first thing. The ladies then talk about how they put a problem on the back burner before sleep or while in the shower and the answer is there when they reboot. Sarah also shares how she recognized this in herself and has consciously worked to value herself whether busy or not. She explains that she heard someone say that sometimes we make ourselves busy to prove to the world that we are important.
Rudy jumps in and does a deep dive on his to-do list while his partner was out of town for two weeks. 12 hours before her return he jumped into overdrive to get it done. He finds he has the most success with lists when he listens to the voice in his head: "it's a man," he thinks "it's probably me." Michael responds that this sounds like what his therapist calls his "Wise Self." Rudy likens it to a coach or a spotter at the gym reminding him to focus on the next step, not the finished product. "Don't do anything else, don't go outside and look at your golf clubs, just go upstairs and start on the bedroom." This Rational Rudy says, calm down just finish "this."
The team briefly talks about doing a superficial job to get thru the list and Krista jokes, "If you don't have time to do it right, you must have time to do it again."
Recorded on 2/23/24
#ADHDListMaking #ToDoLists #ADHDTimeBlindness #TimeBlindness #ADHDPerfectionism #Coaching #ADHDSelfCoaching #Spectrum #ADHDInWomen #Multitasking #Patience #ADHDMultitasking #ProcessingSpeed #ADHDProcessingSpeed #ADHDCompletionAnxiety #CompletionAnxiety #Complete #ADHDHumor #ADHDTypeA #TypeA #LetItGo #ADHDStayAtHomeParents #PrinceHumperdinck #ImSwamped #WiseSelf #ADHDExcuses #BingBingBing #ADHDShowerThoughts #IfYouHaventGotYourHealthThenYouHaventGotAnything #GetSomeRest #HotGuyBlowDryingMyHair #OptimalTimeForADHDers
Link to clip
Jenna Free - ADHDers always have so much to do!
@adhdwithjennafree
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