To be Kenyan is to be rowdy. We shout at everything and everyone. We beat the remote when it doesn't work, and we get beaten up when we don't work. To be Kenyan is to meet at Archives, for everyone else, and Afya Centre if you are Kisii. To be Kenyan is to meet your girlfriend with her boyfriend while you are with your girlfriend. To be Kenyan is to throw stones first, and then ask, the next day, "So why were we throwing stones?" Dating make-up and marrying natural? That's how to be Kenyan. To be Kenyan is to spend half your money on women, and waste the rest on women. In this balderdash, we get petty with peculiar Kenyan stories, not wanting to listen to each other and almost coming to blows before we discovered that is not what the Lord wants since even the Lord is Kenyan, according to how He answers prayers. 
Kila mtu ako na pombe? Because that's how you know you are Kenyan.

PS: Welcome to November Gang. Our Live Show goes down on 27th November, 3PM to 9PM. Coffee Spot, Nairobi CBD. Tickets are 1500, Lipa na Mpesa Number 5620115 (Peter Muigai). Turn Up. That's how you support a Kenyan.

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