Have you wondered why God feels like he's a million miles away? Have you ever wished you could not only be heard but actually hear him talk back to you directly? Strahan Coleman will share tips with us on how to pray effectively, how to experience God personally and how to hear his voice clearly. Strahan Coleman is a musician and the author of several books including his latest book Thirsting. He is also the founder of Commoners Communion.You can get his latest book here: https://amzn.to/40ewXy9To learn more about Strahan Coleman or his music visit: https://www.commonerscommunion.com/Create your podcast today! #madeonzencastrhttps://zencastr.com/?via=thefatherhoodchallengeTranscript - How Dads Can Encounter God---Today we are talking about identity and purpose, specifically how you find your identityand purpose through prayer. And I have brought an expert with me on the program who is built anentire ministry and even written a book specifically about prayer and how to connect with yourcreator. And he will join us in just a moment so don't go anywhere.Welcome to the Father the Challenge, a movement to awaken and inspire fathers everywhere,to take great pride in their role and a challenge society to understand how important fathers areto the stability and culture of their families environment. Now here's your host, JonathanGuerrero. Greetings everyone, thank you so much for joining me. I have a guest on the program,his name is Strahn Coleman. Strahn is an author and he is also an expert in helping people connectpersonally with their creator. Strahn thank you so much for being on the Father the Challenge.Hey Jonathan and absolute pleasure thanks for having me my friend. Strahn what is the story behindhow you got connected with God? What was your first experience and really understanding who God isand inviting him into your life and to a relationship? Well I kind of had a few experienceskind of notched along my life that I think probably transformed my understanding of God butI think just as a kid I had a real openness to the love and the life and the hugeness of God and so I don'tit's not a particular memory so much as a residing sense of this world is massive and it was createdby a massive God and that God is beautiful and good and loving and I don't really know where Igot that from. I think my mother probably installed that in me she was a praying one but I can rememberthinking that way from you know seven eight years old so it wasn't such a particular experience somuch it was a residing acceptance in the wonder and the beauty of the cosmos and the God who made it.So you mentioned that you experience God's love how do you experience God's love what does thatfeel like to you? Well you know sometimes it is a feeling you know sometimes I can spend time with Godand feel just I guess what we might say emotional love or feelings of love but a lot of the timewhat that sense of God's love is for me is actually mostly about an acceptance so I open myselfup to God and one of the things I do when I'm praying that's really really important is I focuson receiving God's love because when God revealed Himself to Moses most of the show me your glory andwhat did God say? He appeared to Moses in his full glory and he said the Lord the Lord gracious andcompassionate, slow to anger and a bounding instead of us love. That's his character that's who he isand so when I when I come to pray I'm like I need to to kind of bring my mind into submission ofthat reality which I don't always I find that difficult to do you know I've got parts of myselfthat I don't think are very lovable I do things that are not very lovable and so in prayer when Iwant to experience God's love I fix my mind on him as a loving person and I meditate on that and thenI think what does it feel like to receive that love into my body and and sometimes that lovefeels like a piece sometimes that love feels like a stillness other times that love expresses in mecrying and confessing and feeling comforted and God's presence and his compassion towards meand sometimes it's a feeling of emotional love but most of the time it's me slowly every day bringingmy body to the reality that he loves me and whether I feel something or not just kind of allowing mymind my soul my nervous system my body to kind of relax and exhale into that experience.The answer that you gave seem very very nebulous and so what I get out of that is the fact thatit has to be it makes every sense that it is because the reasons why you need God's loveare different from every single time you are reaching for it yeah and so the way God respondsto you and offers that love is custom tailored to that specific need at that moment is thatit sounds correct yeah this correct and I think I think too it's really hard for us and we think ofthe love of God it's hard for us in our sort of cultural moment where we we really see love as aheightened romantic emotion which isn't actually true of how people have seen love for you knowthousands of years that really is quite we've got a Hollywood version of love and so when we sayreceiving God's love a lot of people imagine an overwhelming feeling of romantic or romanticemotional sensation but biblical love is far wider and deeper than that and so I like every day whenthe sun rises if I feel the sun on my skin I am experiencing God's love because God causes thesun to rise on the good and evil as friends and as enemies because why he loves them and so part ofthe reason I gave such a nebulous answer is because I wanted to flate this idea that experiencing God'slove is always a kind of hyper-emotional romantic kind of experience but we can't live that way wedon't live our marriages that way we can't live without children that way we can't live with anythingin life that way depending on an emotional romantic love for something sometimes love is grittysometimes love is kind of forcing yourself to do what you don't want to do precisely because thatperson or this thing is of greater value to yourself so I think in prayer what I want to say isis if we think experiencing God's love always has to be a felt emotional thing then we'll see so muchof our prayer as failure but if we can see love as a sort of showing upness and a receiving andupbringing ourselves to each other and sometimes that's really amazing and quote unquote spiritual andand exciting sometimes it's hard work then either way we can see we have an experience of God'slove and that's what matters is that we begin to see God's love expressed in all of these dimensionsand not just in the emotions so I realize my answer was probably a bit vague but I'm trying toyes suggest that we have to move beyond just an emotional love and into a deeper kind of soul levelembodied love with God if we really want to know and experience it yes yes it might seem nebulousbut your answer is very very real I think about practically you know if if all we experienced wasthis romantic sensation that can be quite honest that can be exhausting on the nervous systemthe other thing I want to touch on is is listening to God and hearing God so what is the listeninglike I've heard some people talk that a good practice is journaling sitting down quiet in yourselfthe meditating like you've talked about meditating on God's loveas you quiet down sometimes it's scripture you scripture to do that and if you calm yourself down andyou go into this deep meditation of God and who he is to you does he talk and is it a good practiceto journal when he does yeah I love journaling I mean journaling has been a really kind ofrock bed foundational practice in my life and for me when I pray journal by the way it's like I'llusually try and journal in the morning first thing when you know to get my fresh thoughts in thereand I'll start by saying good morning father always father because that's the context in which Jesuscalled us to pray and he said always pray within the safety and the security of our fatherbecause when you say good morning father you begin the conversation and acceptanceso I start that way good morning father and I might pour my heart out to him and say this is myemotions of feelings sometimes I'll just say speak Lord your servant is listening which is aquote of Samuel the prophet or I might say speak Lord I'm listening we son is listeningand then I try and just you know if I sense him saying something I'll just start writingand I don't try and filter it too much you know I can figure out later if it's just my weird brainmaking something up or whether it's God but and then I kind of converse with him and I foundthat to be really really amazing in the beauty of prayer journaling isn't so much in the one dayit's in the one year two years three years ten years where you slowly begin over time to see oh Ican see when God is speaking and then when I'm interrupting and I'm I'm discerning His voice andmidst my own and I think that's been really key for me you're right about scripture God speaks tous so beautifully through scripture he speaks to us and you know in the New Testamentuh in Acts 2 Areed in Dreams and Visions so in pictures in our minds or um in the night if we'relistening and I think he speaks to us just in the in the depth of us you know I think one of thethings we we often undervalue is just the quiet pinch of something on our conscience like I shouldn'thave said that or sometimes the quiet little sense of I should just tell him that this personyou know I'm still going to someone the other day and I just I just felt to say to him man youlook good he goes to the gem a lot I know he's conscious about his body is like you're looking reallygood he said no I'm over I feel terrible and I be am eyes out of way or something and I said noand I looked him in the eyes and I just said mate you look good dude you're looking fit you're lookinghealthy you should feel great and that was the leading of God as well and speaking to me to kindof share with other people so sometimes it's just a little a little nudge in the very depth ofourselves that we can't often tell if it's us or God until we act on it so there's there's lots inthere there's scripture there's journaling there's the little nudges there's dreams there's picturesthere's sensations and stuff and I I think we just we want the whole sorgas board you know I want tofill our lives with as many little points and places as we can but I think the the main way that Ilisten to God is just by sitting and just allowing his love peace patients gentleness self-controlthe fruit of the spirit to fill my being and he speaks to me in his nature he communicates tome through peace or stillness and in that it's like a hug with it's like an embrace with God it'slike body language it's it's less informational and transactional it's more we are with one anotherand I'm just totally transformed by that it's such a beautiful experience the experience youdescribed is very very different from let's say new age for example I look at things like creationand you when you mention creation new age is also about creation but the difference is thatin a lot of new age and spiritualism thought processes nature and creation is a Godyeah and instead you are experiencing God through nature so when you're in nature it's the other wayaround you are actually moved to a desire to worship the creator of that natureand that's where the difference lies it's like when you're in nature it's like your home becauseyou're in you're among the very things that the same God that created you createdand so there there is a sense of of attachment just because you're you're around you're surroundedby his creation yeah all that does is make you feel closer to him you doesn't make you feel closer tonature it makes you feel closer to the creator yeah yeah that's so good and I think too as well likewe live in a world that's full of kind of mindfulness and meditation and you know where I live I'vegot quite a few friends who are getting heavily into ice baths and they do these aren't believers andthey go on weekends to take sort of a kind of a mushroom and go on trips to encounter themselves andand I think what I said that the biggest difference you know they'll say what's the differencebetween meditation and prayer you know in terms of them they're just kind of sitting there tryingto reach nirvana and for me it's like the biggest difference between say meditation or Buddhismor New Ageism and in what we're looking for is we are looking for a personal relationship with aperson we are not trying to reach a just state of love or state of peace or state of nirvana andwe're not looking for like you say God in creation like creation isn't God it's sort of as a means towhich we experience in a minute's beautiful but when when we come to prayer when we're talking aboutexperiencing love and peace and kindness and gentleness these are not mindfulness states this isan experience of the person of God and I think that's why prayer is so difficult because if it wasjust meditation we could kind of force ourselves into it whenever we wanted right it would be wewould just kind of pull the levers and meditate and do the different things and we would kind ofreach the quote unquote state but we don't believe that as Christians we are encountering the livingGod and so at least half the relationship I would argue the majority of it is God engaging with usinterrupting speaking you know withdrawing his presence so we would cry out to him loving us fillingus and so we this is this is vital and alive and exciting because we are not in control and so whenthat's why for me when I come to prayer it's like I want to understand that I'm experiencing God nomatter what I think I'm experiencing because he's a person who's engaging with me as he desiresand you can't you don't have that same exciting generative relationship with the living Godin the new age or in sort of Buddhism which is primarily about reaching a nirvana or mindfulness whichis just about calming yourself we're moving beyond that into a a relationship with God as a fatherwhich is so beautiful in the dynamic a very common question I hear from people when it comes tohearing God's voice is how do you know the difference between when you're hearing your own thoughtsyou know and by the way on the same exact theta wave that God communicates Satan can alsocommunicate on that same wave so can other non-experience so how do you know it's not ademonic experience and or your own thoughts that's such a good question I I am I mean there's no kind ofsimple one trick hack on that and and if you read the church throughout history they've offered afew different ways but a couple of them are really simple you know scripture we always bank thingsagainst scripture the only slight issue there is that even the devil knows how to wield scripturedo you know what I mean like and in some ways you can you can almost make scripture say whatever youwant it to to you and and people have throughout history so it's got to be more than scripture alsohas to be community we have to work out okay is this voice correct against the truth of Christand the truth of scripture and does that is there consensus amongst Christian community sothat means community present like the church I belong to in my spiritual leadership but it alsomeans like the church historical you know it has the church historically understood this scriptureor this truth this way is another another safe place and and then thirdly for me I think it's justpractice you know I think we have to practice hearing and she hearing from God and shearing itand hearing from others okay this didn't this now this was a bit off it really does take time wehave to be patient with ourselves which is human you know me we're figuring out this stuff and Ithink we have to be patient with ourselves to say I'm going to vulnerable share what God's speakingto me with others so I can be safe you know reading in scripture but I am gonna act on it and I'mgonna see the fruit of those actions if the fruit is love joy peace patients kindness gentlenessand self-control if it fruits goodness in the kingdom of heaven then it was God if the fruit ispride and fear and anxiety and broken relationships and withdrawal from God's peoplethen it's then it probably wasn't God and I think a lot of the time if the fruit of thevoices anxiety fear and condemnation we can say that's not of God but if the fruit is love joypeace patients kindness gentleness and self-control and the desire to give oneself away more we can sayoh yeah that's that's the familiar voice of God one meditation I like to focus on is the conceptof the good shepherd or read scripture I will think about my relationship with my father and focuson that and then as a quiet myself my thoughts will I let my thought drift over to to Jesusand the common thing I hear is that I am the good shepherd my sheep know my voice and thenis usually where that conversation starts to happen and right after that that's usually whereI hear God's voice talking one of the things that you mentioned I think is so important to understandis that you you've said at least twice maybe three times in this conversation we're havingthat it takes time getting used to the voice of God I've heard him often through thoughtI have heard him powerfully powerfully through scripture a handful of times and dreamsand many times through other people there isn't just this one magical formula or way that God speaksand you said very correctly you said he's a person yeah just like you have your own ideas andpreferences and things that you prefer to do the same thing with God yeah and it's a real relationshipand that's what a real relationship looks like there aren't these predictable patterns to go off ofthat's why I love what you said about the different way how we understand when it's him when it'shis voice that we're hearing and the other thing is this takes time yeah and I love that you knowand it changes over time you know I love your kind of reminder he's a God as a personand you think about like a child right how a child hears and understands their parents beenthere a baby it's like go go go go it loves a cuddle you know what I mean it's like parents are likedoing all the work and communicating and they're being kind of you know express so much attentionbut then in order for the child to grow up the parents has to change their communication styles and thenthings change and then the language enters them and then it's okay like this and then and then as thechild grows into an adult it's like things change again and I think one of the things we need to settleinto in life is that our relationship with God is not some static thing whereas the way we heard Godyesterday is going to be exactly the same in 10 years and the next you know I've been through periodswhere the predominant way that God has spoken to me has been in dreams and visionsyou know and and lots of it and then I've gone through periods of time where I haven't had a single onefor like five years and God's spoken to me through prayer journaling and then that's shiftedand it's shifted again and you know it's not they're not clear boundaries but I think we have to beprepared for God to change how he speaks to us as we change and we grow and we become ready to hearand see him in new ways too so I think one of the things I've had to let go of in hearing God'svoices the idea that it's just the same all the time and I've tried to be flexible and say God you showup however you want and there are definitely ways in which that have been consistent through my lifebut there have been plenty of times where I've just not heard God for a long period of time in anykind of conscious way and yeah I've had to go to scripture I've had to listen to to God's peopleI've had to really pay attention to the stillness and so I think that's okay too and it's kind of fun tojust think how out of control we are in this you know how we really have control kind of we're justthe big learners you know yeah we are absolutely not in control and even inside of one specificway that he communicates it's not always the same going back to journaling using that as the exampleI've had cases where I've journal pages of information that of what I'm what God is saying to meand I can hear his voice clear is a bell yeah and everything makes sense and I had one instance whereI came prepared excited waiting to hear God's voice yearning to hear his God's voiceand he spoke but it wasn't in in a page long speech or however you want to look at it it was shortit was just a few lines that's all he had to say and in that specific moment that I'm recallingall God said was go back and read the very last thing that I said to you go back and read thatread it several times that was it that's all he had to say to me amazing and so I went back and Iread it and that's where the experience was when I went back and read it it was like reading it forthe first time the words felt different everything felt different and everything felt relevant to whereI was in that moment of my life so stront I want to really talk about your book thirsty and you justwrote a book tell me about thirsty what is this about and why would dads want to read this firstthing is a book about really about desire to book about what it means to be people who ache and longand how we live in that ache and longing with God but I also tell the story of that the origin of thatlonging and the longing and desire of God and so I think there's an important emphasis in the bookthat God actually longs for and pursues us as a father as our father he doesn't just kind of sit backand wait he pursues us he has like a vital longing aching love to be with every human that he's madeand so I kind of suggest that man if this is who God is then desire is really goodand we have to figure out what it means to bring ourselves to God in that same way to know himand so I kind of have in the book I have these kind of three sections one is it's based on thescripture that Jesus said if anyone first let him come to me and drink and so the first is if anyonefirsts and it's about recognizing the different ways in which we are dehydrated by the worldand the different ways in which we spend our desire and our longing on far less of things than Godand and what we do about that the second is let them come and it's about what it means to live a lifeshaped by communion with God what it lives to live a life of fidelity to understand the depth of oursoul and and how God longs to live with us there and the invitation to be sold equal Godand then the third part is come and drink and it's really about how do we actually drink Godduring because it's a quite a fanciful idea we say this kind of stuff all the time so oh I long for GodI desire God I want to go God you know we can come and drink him but what does it actually mean and soI actually get into some vulnerable stuff of of what it really means to open up and be to be seen by Godto be known by God and in return to actually enjoy his presence there and I think what's criticalabout that for fathers what's critical for me as a father and as a husband is that it helps tounlock these deeper parts of me that I can then offer to my children to my wife that I can livefrom a place of deeper acceptance and if I can live from a place of deeper acceptance and communionwith God then I'm exemplifying a kind of a peace and a love and a stillness to my children and to mywife that that is otherworldly and I can be for them who God has been for me they can experiencethat me as a pursuing loving father that accepts them and all of who they are and wants to go deepwith them so yeah so that's that's kind of the heart behind my desire behind this thing.You're also the founder of a ministry called Commoners Communion what is Commoners Communionand why did you start it? Commoners Communion actually started out of my when I got really sickand I'm a musician so I've been touring for years but I couldn't do it anymore I couldn't singcouldn't write so I started sort of writing blogs and podcasting a little bit for other people whowere trying to reckon with God in the in the in the liminal space like how do we know God whenwhen when we kind of feel like we're struggling in the gap in the walls maybe through suffering maybepeople who are experiencing difficulty in the world and are just connected with people and so Istarted writing prayers and eventually ended up kind of teaching people about prayer and aboutcommunion is something more than just conscious mental dialogue but an actually you know fullbody experience of God in our daily lives and and I've I discovered really a lot of people don't knowhow to pray and so for me it was like yeah okay let's explore this together and that's Commoners Communionit kind of just was a happy accident that has kind of kept going which I feel really grateful for.Strang how can dads listening learn more about what you're doing maybe learn more aboutCommoners Communion and how can they get thirsty? Well you can find thirsty wherever kind of books areyou know if you want to sort of go deeper in in this kind of prayer also have written prayer booksso they're like one page a little prayer I sort of one paragraph devotional thing to kind of helppeople leap into a deeper experience of God so I have three volumes of prayer books that you canengage with but otherwise you know anywhere you'll find Commoners Communion you'll find my work I doa podcast called the Beholding Prayer Podcast and it's just guided meditations on prayer for peoplewho really struggle to pray and that's available resource too so all of those places you'll kind ofhopefully find some ways to engage with God. And just to make things easier if you go to the fatherhoodchallenge.comthat's the fatherhoodchallenge.com if you go to this episode look right below the episode descriptionI'll have all of the links posted there for your convenience. Strahan as we close what is yourchallenge to dads listening now? Ooh yeah challenge to dads my challenge would be to be the eyesthe voice the face and the arms of love to our children. I don't mean just in what we say but I meanin the embrace in the way that we look at them that when they look into our eyes that they would seethe love and the peace and the compassion of God. Easier said than done you know with childrenbut I think I have not seen anything transform my children more than a loving godly temperament.Strahan as we wrap things up would you offer a prayer for dads now? I'd love to yeah it's praying.Father first of all we thank you for being a good involved present and willing father you've lovedus and so I pray now for everybody listening to this conversation to everybody who can hear my voicethat in this moment in their minds and hearts they wouldn't counter this you God the God of Mosesthe Lord the Lord gracious and compassionate abouting instead fast by the slowdown.May they have a full body experience of who you are that they would be rec- that they would receivethe grace to awaken you with you day to day not just for them for their wives for their childrenfor this one and Jesus name. Strahan thank you so much for that prayer thank you so much for beingon the Father and challenge and I enjoyed the conversation and I know that's there too. Thank youJonathan it's been a pleasure. Thank you for listening to this episode of the Fatherhood Challengeif you'd like to contact us listen to other episodes find any resource mentioned in this programor find out more information about the Fatherhood Challenge please visit thefatherhoodchallenge.comthat's thefatherhoodchallenge.com<break time="700ms"/>Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/thefatherhoodchallengepodcast/donations

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