Before Nic ever chose a home birth, there was a deeper journey she had to walk — one of confronting guilt, betrayal, and the slow erosion of self-trust that followed her early hospital births.In Part 1 of this two-part conversation, Nic shares what happened before the home birth: the trauma that didn’t come from the baby being born, but from not being heard, believed, or treated as a person.In this episode, we explore:How Nic internalised guilt and responsibility after her first birth injuryWhat it feels like to be calm in labour — and not believed because of itWhy “doing everything right” doesn’t protect you from system betrayalHow her second hospital birth was technically “better” — but still violatingThe moment she realised she hadn’t had time or space to process either birthWhy stopping halfway through healing leaves trauma running the showThe difference between chasing a “healing birth” and doing the healing workThis conversation is an honest look at how birth trauma forms, how it lingers, and why true healing doesn’t come from one perfect experience — but from reclaiming trust, worth, and agency before the next chapter begins.🎧 Start here with Episode 22, then continue to Episode 23 to hear how this healing journey made Nic’s sovereign home birth possible.www.fantasticfuture.com.au

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