An inevitability in this life is that we will experience times when someone does something that we find hurtful. Sometimes, it is intentional on their behalf, while most times, it is unintended. That does not change the fact that it can be painful. If we are being honest, we all make mistakes. There is a saying that goes; the first time is a mistake; the second time is a choice. When we experience behaviors that wound us and address that behavior with the person, hopefully, they apologize with remorse, and the behavior changes - does not repeat. However, in cases where their chief concern is regret for having been caught and called out or their behavior is repeated again and again, we are then best served to accept the apology and let go of the negative baggage of unforgiveness. However, we have no obligation to allow the person access or reentry into our lives. To deny access is not a petty act of holding a grudge but, instead, an act of self-care. We preserve and protect our mental health and well-being by creating and upholding boundaries between us and those people, places, and things that repeatedly disturb our peace, be it intentional or unintentional. Denying access to bad actors is a way of granting kindness to yourself.

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