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Listen "Episode 21 - Part II: Developing The Intelligence We Need To Thrive: SQ, EQ, Gender & Relationship Intelligence - (with Dr John Gray)"
Episode Synopsis
Join Host Helen Lee and Dr John Gray in part two of this incredible interview. If you missed part one, do tune into and listen to episode 20 first and then continue with this episode. Don't miss out on any of the valuable information and wisdom shared in both!
John Gray is the author of the ultimate relationship book, Men Are From Mars Women Are From Venus. This book is now more than 20 years old, yet it still appears in hot lists across the globe. John has gone on to write many more relationship books, including his most recent Beyond Mars and Venus: Relationship Skills for Today's Complex Worldand also has a substantial career as a speaker and relationship counsellor. Join both John and Helen again in part two of this interview where they delve deep into the societal impacts on relationships today, understanding the power of spirituality and much, much more!
John talks about porn, masturbation, sex, celibacy, hormones, self mastery, emotional mastery, self reflection, brain development, spiritual awareness, his years as a Hindu monk when he was the Maharishi's personal assistant, the great awakening, transforming and thriving through relationships.
And the most useful message that Helen thinks John shared in this conversation with her is that the more we change at this time, "the more we will suffer less”, as there will be great suffering in the years ahead. This is precisely why Helen created “Transform & Thrive”both as a podcast and membership club early this year, to support individuals and organisations worldwide to truly change and flourish, and help others to do the same.
This message can be found at the very end of this episode, along with the simple and powerful process he kindly gifted Helen and her listeners. The process involves our raising our hands with the palms facing outwards and later, shifting both hands to partially facing each other. This interview was conducted over Zoom video which will be included in the youtube video version of this podcast to be launched later on.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
We have to know and understand how men and women are different from each other. Inclusivity means understanding and accepting differences, not denying difference to the point where we ignore diversity.
Understanding differences is the way to personally develop and grow your brain when you’re older. Anything that isn’t growing is dying, that’s the law of entropy. That’s why when we are older we are often the catalysts for understanding difference.
Today more than ever, women need the right hormones to be produced in them to be happy and content. If you are in balance, both spirituality and physically, then you are happy.
We are spiritual beings in a human body, here to transform your programming to become a more loving person. That’s the challenge.
Some things you have to do for your wellbeing. Some things are desirable, but not vital. You have to make sensible choices and discard actions that are eventually unproductive for you.
With simple techniques you can connect to the divine, you can receive its energy into your body and eject your negativity and pain. If you do this enough and have the intention, emotional, spiritual intelligence you can transform yourself by accessing the energy that is all around us.
BEST MOMENTS
"When a man can understand a woman, who he doesn't understand and now he understands her better, he becomes more whole. When a woman can accept and appreciate a man for things that she maybe doesn't appreciate before, she becomes more whole.'
'Another form of help that you (Helen) have mentioned that is missing in the world today which could be a major crux of the problem allows us to go in the wrong direction, is lack of spiritual intelligence.'
'Spiritual intelligence says to a woman, "I am not alone." That's the biggest oestrogen producer in the world. Spiritual awareness in a man increases testosterone because he feels "I have to be a good person to be loved by God"....It is the ultimate coach, it is a belief that there is a higher power that knows more than you and will reward you when you do good.'
'I am a spiritual teacher as well but I teach through love.'
"What I need is different to what she needs"
"If you don't have emotional intelligence then when your partner upsets you, you think they have to change. No, you have to change your emotions then your partner will change [their behaviour]."
So there is gender intelligence in my book. Most people change overnight sometimes with my books because it’s just a correction of “Oh, I didn’t realise what was most important to her” and she goes “Oh I didn’t realise. I thought I was doing something to make him feel better and it was actually making him feel worse. I misunderstood his behaviour. He’s just in his cave, it’s not that he’s mad at me.”’
‘So you have to know what you’re attracted to and why you’re attracted to it. Don’t even think about having sex with a man until you can be naked mentally and emotionally. Then you can become naked physically, otherwise it’s an inappropriate desire.’
‘That’s the female side of everybody that says “Hey, do this for me“. The male side of us says “hey, I’m gonna do this for you.” And women have a male and female side. The female is weak today. For men, the male is weak today.’
‘God’s there. The divine is there. In Christian terms that’s the Holy Spirit now filling us up. Coming through the fingertips. It’s just like a switch, an antennae to pull the energy in.’
ABOUT THE HOST HELEN LEE
Founder & Principal Coach of Lee Heiss Coaching, Helen Lee coached thousands of clients worldwide and multinationals in Asia-Pacific in the last three decades. She created a powerful ontological coaching methodology that ignites the true greatness or invincibility in people. Thoroughly tested and honed over 20 years, this methodology consistently and rapidly produces desired results.
Helen was also a journalist who later ran her own communications consultancies in Australia and Asia.The Business Times listed her in its “Who’s Who of Women Shaping Singapore” while The Straits Times named her “The Leader Prodder” in a feature on Singapore’s top coaches.
VALUABLE RESOURCES
To become a member of the Transform and Thrive Club and benefit from monthly powerful live sessions on Zoom video calls and multimedia coaching, check out and sign up here:
www.transformandthrive.club
CONTACT METHOD
www.leeheiss.com
www.facebook.com/leeheiss
www.facebook.com/transformingpeopleworldwide
www.instagram.com/helenleeheiss
[email protected]
John Gray is the author of the ultimate relationship book, Men Are From Mars Women Are From Venus. This book is now more than 20 years old, yet it still appears in hot lists across the globe. John has gone on to write many more relationship books, including his most recent Beyond Mars and Venus: Relationship Skills for Today's Complex Worldand also has a substantial career as a speaker and relationship counsellor. Join both John and Helen again in part two of this interview where they delve deep into the societal impacts on relationships today, understanding the power of spirituality and much, much more!
John talks about porn, masturbation, sex, celibacy, hormones, self mastery, emotional mastery, self reflection, brain development, spiritual awareness, his years as a Hindu monk when he was the Maharishi's personal assistant, the great awakening, transforming and thriving through relationships.
And the most useful message that Helen thinks John shared in this conversation with her is that the more we change at this time, "the more we will suffer less”, as there will be great suffering in the years ahead. This is precisely why Helen created “Transform & Thrive”both as a podcast and membership club early this year, to support individuals and organisations worldwide to truly change and flourish, and help others to do the same.
This message can be found at the very end of this episode, along with the simple and powerful process he kindly gifted Helen and her listeners. The process involves our raising our hands with the palms facing outwards and later, shifting both hands to partially facing each other. This interview was conducted over Zoom video which will be included in the youtube video version of this podcast to be launched later on.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
We have to know and understand how men and women are different from each other. Inclusivity means understanding and accepting differences, not denying difference to the point where we ignore diversity.
Understanding differences is the way to personally develop and grow your brain when you’re older. Anything that isn’t growing is dying, that’s the law of entropy. That’s why when we are older we are often the catalysts for understanding difference.
Today more than ever, women need the right hormones to be produced in them to be happy and content. If you are in balance, both spirituality and physically, then you are happy.
We are spiritual beings in a human body, here to transform your programming to become a more loving person. That’s the challenge.
Some things you have to do for your wellbeing. Some things are desirable, but not vital. You have to make sensible choices and discard actions that are eventually unproductive for you.
With simple techniques you can connect to the divine, you can receive its energy into your body and eject your negativity and pain. If you do this enough and have the intention, emotional, spiritual intelligence you can transform yourself by accessing the energy that is all around us.
BEST MOMENTS
"When a man can understand a woman, who he doesn't understand and now he understands her better, he becomes more whole. When a woman can accept and appreciate a man for things that she maybe doesn't appreciate before, she becomes more whole.'
'Another form of help that you (Helen) have mentioned that is missing in the world today which could be a major crux of the problem allows us to go in the wrong direction, is lack of spiritual intelligence.'
'Spiritual intelligence says to a woman, "I am not alone." That's the biggest oestrogen producer in the world. Spiritual awareness in a man increases testosterone because he feels "I have to be a good person to be loved by God"....It is the ultimate coach, it is a belief that there is a higher power that knows more than you and will reward you when you do good.'
'I am a spiritual teacher as well but I teach through love.'
"What I need is different to what she needs"
"If you don't have emotional intelligence then when your partner upsets you, you think they have to change. No, you have to change your emotions then your partner will change [their behaviour]."
So there is gender intelligence in my book. Most people change overnight sometimes with my books because it’s just a correction of “Oh, I didn’t realise what was most important to her” and she goes “Oh I didn’t realise. I thought I was doing something to make him feel better and it was actually making him feel worse. I misunderstood his behaviour. He’s just in his cave, it’s not that he’s mad at me.”’
‘So you have to know what you’re attracted to and why you’re attracted to it. Don’t even think about having sex with a man until you can be naked mentally and emotionally. Then you can become naked physically, otherwise it’s an inappropriate desire.’
‘That’s the female side of everybody that says “Hey, do this for me“. The male side of us says “hey, I’m gonna do this for you.” And women have a male and female side. The female is weak today. For men, the male is weak today.’
‘God’s there. The divine is there. In Christian terms that’s the Holy Spirit now filling us up. Coming through the fingertips. It’s just like a switch, an antennae to pull the energy in.’
ABOUT THE HOST HELEN LEE
Founder & Principal Coach of Lee Heiss Coaching, Helen Lee coached thousands of clients worldwide and multinationals in Asia-Pacific in the last three decades. She created a powerful ontological coaching methodology that ignites the true greatness or invincibility in people. Thoroughly tested and honed over 20 years, this methodology consistently and rapidly produces desired results.
Helen was also a journalist who later ran her own communications consultancies in Australia and Asia.The Business Times listed her in its “Who’s Who of Women Shaping Singapore” while The Straits Times named her “The Leader Prodder” in a feature on Singapore’s top coaches.
VALUABLE RESOURCES
To become a member of the Transform and Thrive Club and benefit from monthly powerful live sessions on Zoom video calls and multimedia coaching, check out and sign up here:
www.transformandthrive.club
CONTACT METHOD
www.leeheiss.com
www.facebook.com/leeheiss
www.facebook.com/transformingpeopleworldwide
www.instagram.com/helenleeheiss
[email protected]
More episodes of the podcast Transform & Thrive
Prepare For A Promising 2024! - Part 3
15/01/2024
Prepare For A Promising 2024! - Part 2
08/01/2024
In God we trust