When I was a kid, I believed life was my personal Broadway show; the lights flipped on upon awakening and dimmed when I entered dreamland. Drinking froze my emotional growth, so the spotlight never moved off me. Sobriety and stroke ripped down that set, as I saw the world keep spinning without me. I’ve learned that nobody cares about me as much as I do, which has changed from feelings of isolation and abandonment to liberating independence and freedom of choice. Today I work on healthy self‑love instead of toxic self‑absorption.Alcohol had dressed up my self-centered fear as self‑preservation. If I was drinking, I felt falsely safe. The emotional hangovers were emotional tsunamis of shame, guilt, and resentment. Recovery taught me to balance advocacy with humility. I will spend 6 months fighting health insurance to get a loop heart monitor implant to protect my health. But I’ll also admit when I need help and take someone else’s suggestion. The committee of voices still holds noisy board meetings in my head, so I lean on the tools of my program to slow down and make thoughtful decisions.When I widen the spotlight, I notice an entire cast onstage. Sharing our struggles keeps us teachable. Some days I must protect myself from myself. Getting out of the director’s chair and listening to other people’s lines balances the chaos between my ears. I practice every day shrinking my ego and expanding my heart, which will now be monitored 24/7! Woot woot!Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. For more information, visit me at ⁠⁠⁠recoverydailypodcast.com⁠⁠⁠ or email me at ⁠[email protected]⁠.Visit my Etsy shop, Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcyclingFor more information about vestibular disorders, visit https://vestibular.org.#SobrietyJourney #StrokeSurvivor #EmotionalSobriety #SelfLove #RecoveryCommunity #MentalHealthMatters #HeartHealth #ProgressNotPerfection #OneDayAtATime #LiveSober

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