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Listen "“You Saw The Red Flags...But Ignored Them” - RTBP Episode 227"
Episode Synopsis
Have you ever ignored the warning signs, convinced yourself it wasn’t that deep, only to find yourself in unnecessary pain later? In this deeply personal episode, Arnold explores the biblical wisdom of Proverbs 22:3 and Proverbs 13:20 — unpacking why we often dismiss red flags, how pride and emotional blind spots sabotage our discernment, and why the company we keep shapes our destiny.
This conversation is all about learning to hear God’s whisper before pain has to become our teacher. Whether it’s relationships, finances, or spiritual decisions, we’ll explore how to sharpen our vision, walk with wisdom, and avoid cycles that keep us stuck.
If you’ve ever found yourself saying, “I knew better, but I didn’t do better,” this episode will give you clarity, encouragement, and practical steps to walk differently.
Key Discussion Points
[00:35] Seeing the signs but choosing to ignore them
[02:32] Why we confuse emotional desire with divine direction
[04:51] Wisdom whispers — but do we value her voice enough to listen?
[06:24] The danger of walking with fools (Proverbs 13:20)
[08:20] Red flags we paint pink: how we justify disobedience
[09:33] Comfort dressed as counsel — when friends echo dysfunction
[11:51] Pattern #1: Choosing people who reflect our past, not our future
[13:20] Pattern #2: Confusing busyness for wisdom
[14:05] Pattern #3: Spiritualising avoidance and delaying obedience
[15:02] How to upgrade your circle without arrogance or cold cut-offs
[18:05] Wisdom wears grey hair — the power of intergenerational voices
[20:03] Your circle doesn’t just shape you, it shapes your household and legacy
[22:22] How the wrong relationships dull spiritual clarity
[24:14] The blessing of walking with the wise
[25:15] The real cost of walking with fools — inheriting consequences not yours
[27:04] Four reflection questions to reshape your circle
[28:16] Looking ahead — the transforming power of loving correction
Highlights From The Episode
Wisdom is prevention, not just recovery — pain may teach you lessons, but wisdom helps you avoid the fall altogether.
Your circle is spiritual — who you walk with impacts your family, your peace, your finances, and even your children’s future.
We don’t ignore wisdom because we’re blind; we ignore it because we’re biased. Sometimes we want fantasy more than truth.
Comfort isn’t counsel. The wrong relationships will keep you stuck in cycles, but the right ones accelerate God’s work in your life.
Proximity shapes destiny. The people closest to you influence not just your direction, but who you actually become.
Practical Steps You Can Take
Audit your circle. Ask: who sharpens me, and who smothers me?
Upgrade wisely. Love everyone, but be intentional about who gets your core access.
Create proximity to wisdom. Seek mentors, embrace intergenerational voices, and learn from those who challenge you.
Recognise God’s voice in unexpected people. Don’t let pride block needed correction.
Become what you’re looking for. Walk in wisdom yourself, and you’ll attract wise companions.
Reflect with God. Take 15 minutes to pray through the four reflection questions shared in the episode to start reshaping your circle today.
Relevant Themes Covered
Biblical wisdom and discernment
Proverbs 22:3 & Proverbs 13:20
Recognising and responding to red flags
Spiritual growth and obedience
The power of community and inner circles
Legacy and generational impact
Godly relationships vs. destructive patterns
Connect with RTB
For podcast updates, exclusive daily devotional emails and more, join the RTB community! Sign up here: www.reasontobehold.com
Got a question or want to share your thoughts and reflections from the episode? We’d love to hear from you!
Contact us: [email protected]
This conversation is all about learning to hear God’s whisper before pain has to become our teacher. Whether it’s relationships, finances, or spiritual decisions, we’ll explore how to sharpen our vision, walk with wisdom, and avoid cycles that keep us stuck.
If you’ve ever found yourself saying, “I knew better, but I didn’t do better,” this episode will give you clarity, encouragement, and practical steps to walk differently.
Key Discussion Points
[00:35] Seeing the signs but choosing to ignore them
[02:32] Why we confuse emotional desire with divine direction
[04:51] Wisdom whispers — but do we value her voice enough to listen?
[06:24] The danger of walking with fools (Proverbs 13:20)
[08:20] Red flags we paint pink: how we justify disobedience
[09:33] Comfort dressed as counsel — when friends echo dysfunction
[11:51] Pattern #1: Choosing people who reflect our past, not our future
[13:20] Pattern #2: Confusing busyness for wisdom
[14:05] Pattern #3: Spiritualising avoidance and delaying obedience
[15:02] How to upgrade your circle without arrogance or cold cut-offs
[18:05] Wisdom wears grey hair — the power of intergenerational voices
[20:03] Your circle doesn’t just shape you, it shapes your household and legacy
[22:22] How the wrong relationships dull spiritual clarity
[24:14] The blessing of walking with the wise
[25:15] The real cost of walking with fools — inheriting consequences not yours
[27:04] Four reflection questions to reshape your circle
[28:16] Looking ahead — the transforming power of loving correction
Highlights From The Episode
Wisdom is prevention, not just recovery — pain may teach you lessons, but wisdom helps you avoid the fall altogether.
Your circle is spiritual — who you walk with impacts your family, your peace, your finances, and even your children’s future.
We don’t ignore wisdom because we’re blind; we ignore it because we’re biased. Sometimes we want fantasy more than truth.
Comfort isn’t counsel. The wrong relationships will keep you stuck in cycles, but the right ones accelerate God’s work in your life.
Proximity shapes destiny. The people closest to you influence not just your direction, but who you actually become.
Practical Steps You Can Take
Audit your circle. Ask: who sharpens me, and who smothers me?
Upgrade wisely. Love everyone, but be intentional about who gets your core access.
Create proximity to wisdom. Seek mentors, embrace intergenerational voices, and learn from those who challenge you.
Recognise God’s voice in unexpected people. Don’t let pride block needed correction.
Become what you’re looking for. Walk in wisdom yourself, and you’ll attract wise companions.
Reflect with God. Take 15 minutes to pray through the four reflection questions shared in the episode to start reshaping your circle today.
Relevant Themes Covered
Biblical wisdom and discernment
Proverbs 22:3 & Proverbs 13:20
Recognising and responding to red flags
Spiritual growth and obedience
The power of community and inner circles
Legacy and generational impact
Godly relationships vs. destructive patterns
Connect with RTB
For podcast updates, exclusive daily devotional emails and more, join the RTB community! Sign up here: www.reasontobehold.com
Got a question or want to share your thoughts and reflections from the episode? We’d love to hear from you!
Contact us: [email protected]
In God we trust