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Listen "The First Step Forward is Today"
Episode Synopsis
This is the Mindset for Life podcast, a place for personal stories, coaching, neuroscience and my favorite positive psychology tools to master life, relationships and work. I'm your host. Bethanie Hansen. Welcome, welcome. I'm so glad you're here. We're going to talk about a mindset to do something new.
Have you ever set a goal before, and you thought like, I'll start Monday, or I'll start January 1, or I'll start at the first of the month, that'll be a good time to measure my progress?
But whatever it is that you want to take up to the next level, the first step is today, and the mindset I want to share with you today is that ongoing, continuous improvement mindset. So, maybe you've been coached before, or maybe not. Either way, I'm glad you're here, and I want to talk about Coach philosophy a little bit.
I have had so many coaches in my life because I've gone to coach trainings and schools. I've had peer coach partners that have worked with me, and I've been coached a lot, so I have set a lot of goals. And sometimes I've done those goals for a week or two, or even a few months, and I've come away from some coaching sessions with totally new ideas, but a lot of times I have good intentions. I'll set a goal with a coach and it'll last a day or two.
Has that ever happened with your goals? I would really like to make a big change, a permanent change, and that's going to take more than just a little bit of resolve.
Today, if that's you, if you're looking for taking something up a level, let's do a little bit of inventory.
The first thing to adopt a mindset of continuous improvement is to realize it's a journey instead of a destination. Some of the goals we used to set for ourselves might have been destination-oriented. Like, we want to achieve a certain ability physically, like run under a certain time limit, or be able to do a certain number of crunches or push ups or pull ups, or maybe to lose a little bit of weight or get a certain amount of sleep. There are a lot of physical goals we can set, and they're easy to measure because we either do them or we don't do them.
But other goals about improving ourselves, personally and professionally, a lot of those goals don't have destinations. They're what I call “process goals.”
They're the kind of goals where we have to become the kind of person who would do that sort of thing to reach that goal.
One of those things is leadership. For example, if you want to be a really good leader and you're thinking about becoming a better speaker publicly, the first step is actually learning to listen better. So if I was going to set a goal around my listening, I would have to start there. And I don't want to wait till Monday morning or the first of the month, or even wait clear till January 1. What I want to do is start today. The first step is today, in the next hour, two hours, or even in the next five minutes.
Taking this all the way means committing now and just working on it intentionally. That first step is to intentionally move in the direction that you want to go. That intention is everything. As soon as you decide you're really gonna do it, and you think about it, you reflect on it, you journal about it, you learn more about that thing, you study it out, and you start to occupy your mind with that goal.
Pretty soon your subconscious brain becomes your partner, and it helps you to get there. And all kinds of opportunities come into your life to give you chances to grow in that way.
You might not be sure what you really want, but you probably know what you don't want, and we could start right there.
So whatever it is you don't want, what is it that's going to fill that space? So whatever your goal is, in whether it's a physical, intellectual, emotional, social or spiritual goal, you could decide, well, what, what don't you want first? And what would you want instead of that?
Even if it's not the end goal, maybe it's like the first step up the ladder from what you have right now.
Let me give an example of that. I had one coach client recently who shared with me that she wanted to stop giving her son money, and so the first step was to stop giving him money as often, and then the next step was to stop giving him money, but maybe offer other things, like a meal or something like that. It's like baby steps to the point of no longer giving the money.
Sometimes it seems like cutting things off immediately is is the plan, but that could actually set you up to fail. If you take baby steps up the ladder until you get to the goal that you're trying to achieve, then you can adjust your thoughts, your expectations, you can address the judgments that come into your mind about yourself and other people and all the resistance you've been feeling, and you can actually make that change so much better.
When you're not sure what you really want and you really do want to take a step towards your goal, start looking at what you don't want and what one degree away or 10 degrees away from that might be.
So maybe you're aware that your talents and your better strengths should be shining right now, and maybe you're afraid they're not going to or maybe you even feel like they're not shining for you. One thing I would suggest there is to be thinking about what your strengths are.
I had a coach conversation this morning where I was the client and someone else was coaching me, and I started out with a desire to take it up a level. You might have noticed that the opening song today came from suno AI. I wrote that song and then it was performed by AI. That's about taking it up a level.
So if you want things to be better than they are right now and different, we want to take them up a level, meaning we don't want to go back. We want to change our relationships. We want to change the way we're interacting with people, the way we're interacting with ourselves, the way we see ourselves. And we want to make a permanent and total change in some area. Taking it up a level means just moving it up a little more.
You don't have to skip all the way to the end, you don't have to pretend you're something you're not, or try to convince yourself that you like behaving in some way. That's really a stretch for you. Just take one step and just get started, and then you're going to be getting somewhere new.
And this will take you up a level or maybe even two, and it's going to get you moving today. So if you've had thoughts about being better than you were before in a situation or with a certain person, or in the way you set boundaries with people, or the way you perform at work, whatever it is, you really can shine in reaching your goals. You don't have to keep making excuses about why you can't achieve them. You can change things, and the first step is a mindset to see what a small change would look like.
Now I have seen a lot of people make very small changes over time and eventually reach huge goals.
In my own journal, I was thinking about a situation I've been working on for the past two years, and I wrote down about that situation that I noticed I was making slow but steady and incremental improvements in that area. Some days it feels like no improvement at all. And in fact, it might feel like I'm slipping backwards a bit, but when I look at the big picture over time, I have really dedicated myself to improving in a certain area, and I can see the progress in my life.
I hope that you will make the kind of progress you want to make in that area that you would like to change. Let's take this goal you have and let's take it all the way down the road. Your talents and your better strengths really can shine. So I want to leave you today with a little inspirational thought through the song that opened the podcast. It's called The first step is today. I'm going to play it for you, and that's how we'll wrap it up today.
Thank you for being here, and if you're ready for a coach, come visit me on DRBcoach.com I do have room for five clients currently, and I would love to speak with you. No commitment. It's a free discovery call. You can just come. We can have a conversation and learn what your goals are and see if coaching is a good fit for you.
Join me for today's episode!
This episode's theme song is "Take It Up A Level" by Bethanie Hansen and SUNO AI. Used with Permission.
Like what you read here? In this podcast, I’m sharing some core principles I’ve learned in coaching that have completely changed my life. And I share them in 1:1 and workshop work with teachers who want a change in their lives, career direction, or relationships, and just aren't sure how to start. With a personal coach, you can take it deeper, to make these changes a lasting part of your life. You can figure out where to start and how to get the changes you really want.
Have you ever set a goal before, and you thought like, I'll start Monday, or I'll start January 1, or I'll start at the first of the month, that'll be a good time to measure my progress?
But whatever it is that you want to take up to the next level, the first step is today, and the mindset I want to share with you today is that ongoing, continuous improvement mindset. So, maybe you've been coached before, or maybe not. Either way, I'm glad you're here, and I want to talk about Coach philosophy a little bit.
I have had so many coaches in my life because I've gone to coach trainings and schools. I've had peer coach partners that have worked with me, and I've been coached a lot, so I have set a lot of goals. And sometimes I've done those goals for a week or two, or even a few months, and I've come away from some coaching sessions with totally new ideas, but a lot of times I have good intentions. I'll set a goal with a coach and it'll last a day or two.
Has that ever happened with your goals? I would really like to make a big change, a permanent change, and that's going to take more than just a little bit of resolve.
Today, if that's you, if you're looking for taking something up a level, let's do a little bit of inventory.
The first thing to adopt a mindset of continuous improvement is to realize it's a journey instead of a destination. Some of the goals we used to set for ourselves might have been destination-oriented. Like, we want to achieve a certain ability physically, like run under a certain time limit, or be able to do a certain number of crunches or push ups or pull ups, or maybe to lose a little bit of weight or get a certain amount of sleep. There are a lot of physical goals we can set, and they're easy to measure because we either do them or we don't do them.
But other goals about improving ourselves, personally and professionally, a lot of those goals don't have destinations. They're what I call “process goals.”
They're the kind of goals where we have to become the kind of person who would do that sort of thing to reach that goal.
One of those things is leadership. For example, if you want to be a really good leader and you're thinking about becoming a better speaker publicly, the first step is actually learning to listen better. So if I was going to set a goal around my listening, I would have to start there. And I don't want to wait till Monday morning or the first of the month, or even wait clear till January 1. What I want to do is start today. The first step is today, in the next hour, two hours, or even in the next five minutes.
Taking this all the way means committing now and just working on it intentionally. That first step is to intentionally move in the direction that you want to go. That intention is everything. As soon as you decide you're really gonna do it, and you think about it, you reflect on it, you journal about it, you learn more about that thing, you study it out, and you start to occupy your mind with that goal.
Pretty soon your subconscious brain becomes your partner, and it helps you to get there. And all kinds of opportunities come into your life to give you chances to grow in that way.
You might not be sure what you really want, but you probably know what you don't want, and we could start right there.
So whatever it is you don't want, what is it that's going to fill that space? So whatever your goal is, in whether it's a physical, intellectual, emotional, social or spiritual goal, you could decide, well, what, what don't you want first? And what would you want instead of that?
Even if it's not the end goal, maybe it's like the first step up the ladder from what you have right now.
Let me give an example of that. I had one coach client recently who shared with me that she wanted to stop giving her son money, and so the first step was to stop giving him money as often, and then the next step was to stop giving him money, but maybe offer other things, like a meal or something like that. It's like baby steps to the point of no longer giving the money.
Sometimes it seems like cutting things off immediately is is the plan, but that could actually set you up to fail. If you take baby steps up the ladder until you get to the goal that you're trying to achieve, then you can adjust your thoughts, your expectations, you can address the judgments that come into your mind about yourself and other people and all the resistance you've been feeling, and you can actually make that change so much better.
When you're not sure what you really want and you really do want to take a step towards your goal, start looking at what you don't want and what one degree away or 10 degrees away from that might be.
So maybe you're aware that your talents and your better strengths should be shining right now, and maybe you're afraid they're not going to or maybe you even feel like they're not shining for you. One thing I would suggest there is to be thinking about what your strengths are.
I had a coach conversation this morning where I was the client and someone else was coaching me, and I started out with a desire to take it up a level. You might have noticed that the opening song today came from suno AI. I wrote that song and then it was performed by AI. That's about taking it up a level.
So if you want things to be better than they are right now and different, we want to take them up a level, meaning we don't want to go back. We want to change our relationships. We want to change the way we're interacting with people, the way we're interacting with ourselves, the way we see ourselves. And we want to make a permanent and total change in some area. Taking it up a level means just moving it up a little more.
You don't have to skip all the way to the end, you don't have to pretend you're something you're not, or try to convince yourself that you like behaving in some way. That's really a stretch for you. Just take one step and just get started, and then you're going to be getting somewhere new.
And this will take you up a level or maybe even two, and it's going to get you moving today. So if you've had thoughts about being better than you were before in a situation or with a certain person, or in the way you set boundaries with people, or the way you perform at work, whatever it is, you really can shine in reaching your goals. You don't have to keep making excuses about why you can't achieve them. You can change things, and the first step is a mindset to see what a small change would look like.
Now I have seen a lot of people make very small changes over time and eventually reach huge goals.
In my own journal, I was thinking about a situation I've been working on for the past two years, and I wrote down about that situation that I noticed I was making slow but steady and incremental improvements in that area. Some days it feels like no improvement at all. And in fact, it might feel like I'm slipping backwards a bit, but when I look at the big picture over time, I have really dedicated myself to improving in a certain area, and I can see the progress in my life.
I hope that you will make the kind of progress you want to make in that area that you would like to change. Let's take this goal you have and let's take it all the way down the road. Your talents and your better strengths really can shine. So I want to leave you today with a little inspirational thought through the song that opened the podcast. It's called The first step is today. I'm going to play it for you, and that's how we'll wrap it up today.
Thank you for being here, and if you're ready for a coach, come visit me on DRBcoach.com I do have room for five clients currently, and I would love to speak with you. No commitment. It's a free discovery call. You can just come. We can have a conversation and learn what your goals are and see if coaching is a good fit for you.
Join me for today's episode!
This episode's theme song is "Take It Up A Level" by Bethanie Hansen and SUNO AI. Used with Permission.
Like what you read here? In this podcast, I’m sharing some core principles I’ve learned in coaching that have completely changed my life. And I share them in 1:1 and workshop work with teachers who want a change in their lives, career direction, or relationships, and just aren't sure how to start. With a personal coach, you can take it deeper, to make these changes a lasting part of your life. You can figure out where to start and how to get the changes you really want.
In God we trust