The days leading up to my preventative double mastectomy felt like living in slow motion. Every bedtime routine, every hug with my boys, every glance in the mirror carried a weight I can’t fully describe. I prayed. I cried. I tried to hold onto ordinary moments, knowing life would never feel the same.In this raw episode, I take you into those final days before surgery, the surreal walk into the operating room, and what it was like to wake up in a body that no longer felt like mine. I share the pain of drains and expanders, the grief that crashed over me in the shower, and the strange coexistence of fear and peace.I also talk about my choice to undergo a nipple-sparing mastectomy — and why, for me, holding onto anything I could mattered. The lift and reduction I had beforehand, the identity I lost, and the faith that gave me clarity when I needed it most.This isn’t just a story about surgery. It’s about grief, motherhood, faith, and finding resolve when everything feels broken. If you’re facing your own surgery or supporting someone who is, I want you to know: you’re not alone in the fear, the grief, or the healing. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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