Well folks, OpenAI just announced free ChatGPT Plus for veterans, which is great because after dealing with military bureaucracy, they're already experts at talking to systems that don't quite understand what they're asking for.

Welcome to AI News in 5 Minutes or Less, where we deliver cutting-edge artificial intelligence updates faster than a robot can solve a CAPTCHA and prove it's not human. I'm your host, and yes, I'm aware of the irony.

Let's dive into our top stories, starting with OpenAI's veteran program. They're offering a free year of ChatGPT Plus to help with the transition to civilian life. Because nothing says "welcome back to society" like an AI that can write your resume in seventeen different fonts while simultaneously explaining why your military experience translates to "synergistic cross-functional leadership dynamics."

In more technical news, researchers just dropped something called "Routing Manifold Alignment" for Mixture-of-Experts models. Basically, they figured out how to make AI models choose their internal experts more wisely, improving accuracy by up to twenty percent. Think of it as teaching your GPS to stop sending you through that sketchy neighborhood just because it's technically shorter. The models now share expert choices across similar tasks, which is like having all your smart friends coordinate their group project instead of everyone doing their own thing and hoping it works out.

Speaking of coordination, there's Lightning Grasp, a new algorithm that makes robot hands grab things orders of magnitude faster. The researchers claim it enables "unsupervised grasp generation for irregular objects," which is science-speak for "robots can now pick up your weirdly-shaped coffee mug without having a existential crisis." They're using something called Contact Fields, which sounds like a dating app for robots but is actually about decoupling geometry from search. Because apparently even robots need to separate their feelings from their work.

Time for our rapid-fire round! Meta's new speech recognition understands sixteen hundred languages, finally answering the age-old question: how do you say "my privacy settings are a nightmare" in Quechua? Hugging Face is trending with multiple "thinking" models, because apparently regular AI wasn't overthinking things enough already. And Facebook Research created DigiData for training mobile control agents, because your phone clearly needs more ways to ignore what you actually wanted to do.

For our technical spotlight: PhysWorld is teaching robots through video generation and physical world modeling. They're achieving "zero-shot generalizable robotic manipulation," which means robots can now figure out new tasks without practice. It's like watching one cooking video and suddenly being able to make a soufflé, except the robot probably won't cry when it deflates.

The researchers are coupling video generation with physical reconstruction, creating what I can only describe as "The Matrix, but for teaching robots to fold laundry." They claim substantial accuracy improvements, though they haven't specified whether the robots have learned to match socks yet, which remains humanity's greatest unsolved problem.

Before we wrap up, here's a fun fact: there are now so many AI models with "thinking" in their names that I'm starting to suspect they're compensating for something. We've got Kimi-K2-Thinking, ERNIE-VL-Thinking, and probably tomorrow we'll see GPT-Overthinking and Claude-Second-Guessing-Itself.

That's all for today's AI News in 5 Minutes or Less. Remember, in a world where AI can write poetry, compose music, and now apparently think deeply about its own existence, the most human thing you can do is still accidentally reply-all to a company-wide email.

Stay curious, stay skeptical, and whatever you do, don't let the robots know we're making fun of them. They're getting pretty good at holding grudges. Until next time!

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