My first podcast guest is my mom, Diane Buehler—and this conversation goes places I never expected. She shares stories I'd never heard in detail: growing up on five acres in Indiana eating the pigs she raised for 4-H, hitchhiking as a teenager in California, joining a traveling Christian theater group that performed in San Quentin, and meeting my dad at Bible college over joints and parties that led to 11 years of domestic violence.This is a raw, honest conversation about survival. Mom shares what it was like being timed at the grocery store, hearing my dad talk about her to himself when he thought she'd left, living in fear with fists hovering over her saying "I'm going to kill you," and the moment she finally grabbed us four kids and drove to her sister's house. We discuss the pediatrician who told her "just walk" when she said I was depressed at age 10, the marriage counselor who said "choose the best of two evils," and why she stayed five more years after that.But this isn't just about abuse—it's about what came after. Getting out with a five-month-old baby, going on welfare with a bachelor's degree, getting her master's in teaching while raising four kids alone, the Gonzaga law students who represented her divorce for free, working 70 hours a week in Las Vegas, becoming pregnant with her fifth child in a second failed marriage, dealing with her son's decade-long addiction to meth and fentanyl, and the power of praying over sleeping children in cribs.Mom reflects on generational sin, the cost of being too busy to be present, why "just do the right thing" took her 60+ years to understand, her trauma therapy and grounding practices, and how she maintained faith as a "lukewarm Christian" through all of it. Featuring wisdom on domestic violence escape planning (shelters, legal aid, the danger of going back), the brainwashing that keeps victims trapped, why emotional abuse destroys self-esteem, and what she'd tell her younger rebellious self.We close with Isaiah 43: "When you walk through fire, you shall not be burned and the flame shall not consume you."Content warning: This episode contains detailed discussions of domestic violence, physical and emotional abuse, and addiction.If you or someone you know needs help: National Domestic Violence Hotline: 800-799-SAFE (7233) or thehotline.orgWant to share a thought?Support the show🔗 All links: https://linktr.ee/standingnowhere🎧 Listen on your favorite app💬 Join our community on Discord📩 Email: [email protected](Tap “Support the show” above to become a Patron — thank you!)

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