Today, Donald Trump mentioned UTDTrey in a Tweet—which can only spell disaster for Trump’s campaign, since nobody can escape the Trey jinx. It’s no surprise, then, that the team he reps has steadily been on the decline since he joined Twitter. As Jacob says, United are towing the line between being hated and being forgotten—and for a franchise like Manchester United, the latter might be worse. Gameweek 6 also saw City draw to Newcastle, Arsenal avoid dropping points at the death against Leicester, and a certain Cole Palmer become the first and only player in Premier League history to score four goals in one half of football. We start our Dilemma Deliberations with this starboy—is now the time? Should he have been included in our discussions about the trifecta of Haaland, Salah, and Saka last week? What even is the word for trifecta, but … four? Quadfecta? Superfecta? We then conjecture about whether or not the Philip Walter Foden train is fast approaching the station, and round off the segment with a theoretical lament on our abysmal team values (but seriously, it’s an important issue!). Finally, captaincy indeed seems to be a decision between our newly minted Fantastic Four—which fixture looks like the friendliest of the bunch?

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