Ice Over Purple

I will write an extended blog post on this track soon. I've been working on this one for months, but have never been able to get it to where I want. I have never been happy with my vocal work on it. So, instead of singing or chanting the psalm, I just whispered it. The result was the creepy, hate-filled vibe I think it needs.

This is an extended meditation on what it means for a Christian to pray Psalm 139:19ff. I've heard many bad sermons on, and interpretations of, this psalm. In sum, I think we should quit trying to sanitize it, it isn't God's word to us. It is the truth about who we are. Loving God cannot mean hating our enemies. The character the psalmist embodied, like the character I embodied when I composed and whispered this track is simply wrong about loving God—that isn't love. It is simply demonic hatred trying to hide behind a mask of sanctity. But it is also true. Because I feel these things. I could embody the character because he is not foreign to me, as much as I wish he were.

The title comes from a sheet of paper I saw on a crash cart at a hospital as a woman I was visiting lay dying after 3 years of fighting cancer. I don't know what it means. But is is a phrase that stuck with me.

The key is C in Jeth's mode. I'd never heard of it. But when I started playing with it, the basic melody and chords came out.

Lots of Nord Lead 4R, Native Instruments Battery for the drums, Studio One 3.5 and 4.0 for mixing. All the usual outboard gear and plugins.

ps 139:19ff

si occideris Deus impium
viri sanguinum declinate a me

qui contradicent tibi scelerate elati sunt frustra adversarii tui

nonne odientes te Domine odivi et contra adversarios tuos distabui

perfecto odio oderam illos inimici facti sunt mihi

scrutare me Deus et cognosce cor meum
proba me et scito cogitationes meas

et vide si via idoli in me est
et deduc me in via aeterna