Want to be an exceptional leader? Be an exceptional SELF-leader.

Self-leadership is the way you lead yourself. It's taking full ownership of your attitude, effort, communication, and wellbeing.

In this week's episode of Reflect Forward: Advice From a CEO, I share a few stories to demonstrate self-leadership in action and some painful experiences I went through to learn how to be a strong self-leader.

As I have matured aka gotten older, I've realized how profound these experiences were. Throughout my life, I have learned the power of facing conflict head-on, advocating for myself, and taking feedback even when it was really hard to hear. I’ve learned how being accountable for my actions and engaging in hard conversations empowers me to make different choices in my life. I’ve learned not to be a victim of my circumstance; instead, I know how to change my circumstances to make my life better.

I share these stories during the episode in hopes that you can see yourself in them. We all lose sight of the big picture. We all are guilty of having an inward mindset. We are all guilty of telling ourselves false stories that allow us to be victims of our circumstances. But we also have to power to change it. You, too, can be an accountable, self-leading kind of leader. And being one will bring you success.

So how can you practice being a strong, successful self-leader? Listen to find out more!

Question from the episode comes from someone who follows me on social media, "Kerry, how do you calm your nerves when you go on stage or in front of the camera. I hate public speaking, but I want to get better at it."

I have been doing a lot of speaking for organizations and companies these days, and it never fails every time I am nervous. So here are a few things I do to calm my nerves.
1. Write out what I will say, whether it's a paid speech or an important message in a company meeting. Being prepared will make you feel more confident.
2. I always take a few deep breaths before I start. Breathing is the best way to ground yourself. If am really nervous, I go out for a quick walk. Fresh air and movement always make me feel better.
3. I talk about things I know, and I share personal stories. It's amazing what happens when you recall a story. It puts you at ease and allows people to connect with you.
4. Talk slower than you think you need to. It allows you to breathe and collect yourself as you talk.
5. Don't be afraid to use notecards and look at them if needed. Everyone understands you want to stay on point.
6. Smile. Smiling when you talk makes everyone feel more at ease, including you.
7. It's okay if you mess up, miss a word, or have to repeat yourself because you fumbled a sentence. People connect with humanity, not polish. You don't have to be perfect.

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