SHOW NOTES:
On this show, we are letting go of our old ways of thinking to learn why silence, perspective, and always needing the last word may be holding us back.
Have you ever caught yourself clinging to a belief simply because it feels like yours to protect, even when it no longer fits the moment or serves the relationship? Or felt compelled to say one more thing, just to make sure you’re understood, validated, or seen as right, only to walk away feeling a little more frustrated than fulfilled?
We’re taking a closer look at the roots of our thinking: where they came from, how they became so automatic, and why they can be so hard to release. We’ll explore the underestimated power of silence, the gift of stepping back, and the clarity that can come from listening to the B-side of your beliefs. That’s the perspective we often ignore, but it just might set us free. This episode is your chance to pause, reflect, and make room for something new.
Before we can begin letting go of our old ways of thinking, we have to understand what those “old ways” really are and why they’re so sticky. This segment sets the foundation by exploring four core ideas that will guide the rest of our conversation: inherited thinking, the compulsion to be right, the power of silence, and the value of perspective.
1. Old Ways of Thinking: Where Did They Come From?
We don’t just wake up one day with a fixed mindset. Most of our beliefs, assumptions, and mental habits were inherited. We picked them up from family, culture, community, trauma, school, media, or lived experience. Some were explicitly taught, like “Don’t speak unless spoken to.” Others were absorbed through repetition or modeled behavior. Over time, these ideas become so ingrained that we stop questioning them. They feel safe and familiar, but that doesn’t mean they’re serving us.
2. The Need to Be Right and Have the Last Word
Let’s face it. Most of us have been in a conversation where we had to make our point, clarify our stance, or get the last word in. That compulsion often comes from fear: fear of being misunderstood, fear of looking weak, or fear of losing control. In some cases, it’s ego. In others, it’s a form of protection, often shaped by past moments when staying quiet came at a cost. But constantly defending our viewpoint keeps us stuck. It makes learning and connection harder and turns dialogue into debate.
3. The Power of Silence
Silence gets a bad reputation. We rush to fill quiet moments in conversation, viewing them as awkward or uncomfortable, or assuming they mean something is wrong. But silence can be a powerful tool. It gives us time to process, to listen fully, to think instead of react. Silence invites reflection. It creates space for others. And sometimes, saying nothing speaks volumes. In a world of noise, silence can be the most honest response.
4. Perspective: The B-Side of the Story
Imagine your beliefs as a 45-record. The A-side is your familiar story. It’s what you’ve always believed to be true. It’s catchy, comfortable, and easy to play. But flip it over, and there’s a B-side—a quieter, less popular track that offers a different rhythm. Perspective means seeing beyond the obvious and stepping outside your default view. It’s not about abandoning your truth but creating space for more than one version of reality. When we only ever play the A-side, we miss the deeper track that might change everything.
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CHALLENGE: Notice when old thinking shows up and instead of reacting, pause long enough to ask yourself, “Is there another side to this?” Be willing to release the need to be right and choose growth, peace, and presence instead.



I Know YOU Can Do It!

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